Thursday, January 12, 2012

remaining vulnerable

It's a grey and rainy evening here in Guelph town and I am yearning to see the blinding whiteness of sunny, snowy, crisp days that are the usual for mid-January.

I miss winter.

Anyway, with all the spare time I have these days I happened upon an old journal entry from 2009. I was shocked at how appropriate it is for me at this point in my life.

Here it is:

Remaining vulnerable

Try not to harden against that soft spot inside.
Let it grow.
Don't be afraid.
Cultivate the feelings of rejoicing
both for yourself and for others.
Try to catch when you are closing down on yourself.
Stay with the vulnerability in whatever kind of feeling you are experiencing.
Trust in the fundamental openness which is your true nature.
Train yourself to stay in the present... where the joy is.
It holds the root of your happiness.

So there is my contribution for the day.
Peace out,

1 comment:

  1. Julia,

    I know we are in completely different places right now. Worlds away in our experiences.

    Still, your writing expresses exactly what I too must remember every day. Every 'today' of my recovery and sobriety must begin and end with remembering where my joy is. Where my love is. Remembering to care and nurture and protect that vulnerability so as to never find myself in those dark places I once was.

    Learning to be open in spite of fear is key. Courage is hard, but to not be courageous is harder. That soft spot is the very essence of what makes life worth living.

    So as it turns out, we aren't so far away from one another in the end.

    I pray for you every night.
    Keep the courage.
    Love is with you every step of the way.

    Thank you for sharing this.